Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

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BB Update Time:
Well, when the last HW fell asleep, Lipgloss emerged from her room naked as a jay bird and starting doing the slide-and-shuffle against all the two-way mirrors repeatedly moaning the name Bob and eventually collapsed in a heap on the living room amid much camera whirring and sweat.
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Ok so that didn't happen. But from the standpoint of her uniquely repressed personality, the equivalent has certainly been a house constant lately.
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BB has got some priceless footage in the bank and I'm torn about what to spill and what to keep in the bank for them to entertain you... and then again I can always say phuk-it and give. That being said:

Watch for the pug fest. HA! They locked up the Half Wits without the pug and gave the loosers an envelope saying "Do not open the letter until BB directs you to do so..." After 4-ever, BB comes on-line and tells 'em to go ahead and READ 'ER. Seems they have a challenge... the challenge is to find the pug - not just any pug mind you. They must find their pug. Ok, big whoop. Out they go and what do they find? A back yard totally filled with PUG dogs. LOL!!! I cannot wait to see how that looks on TV. Mr. Invisible won the challenge - the dog was in the storage room? How fair is that? And he'll get to do a TV Weather report for some local station as a reward!!! Anybody else remember Nichole Kidman as the Weather Lady in that movie?
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Things you wont see on the Tele. BOB, or whoever... hell, it's prol'y the whole camera crew of bored-out-of-their-collective-professional-cameraperson-skulls camera-people are doing their best to miss a single inch of Lipgloss flesh (and wouldn't she just shit to see this...). There's the three camera feed that catches Lips lying on the couch and reaching over the top for a pillow or something and exposes a complete expanse from hip to bra strap... or the bend over deal when she went for a drink of water... undi-trim to mid-back. Yeah, I know, this is pretty silly stuff. But exactly what else do these people (the camera-people) have to do? The other HWs are not exactly stopping the clocks with their antics. Oh yea, and there was another tanning session by the pool yesterday that Lipgloss thought would once-again foil the BB best efforts to exploit via the shrubbery she reclines in front of - forgetting, of course, that every two-way mirror on the outside of the house is a camera! The live feeds are dedicated to the long view of her: lying down on the ground the camera starts with focus on her feet then reduces focal length as it pans her body ending up on the top of her head.
Elmer had a close call the other day... he was running this gag with Lipgloss, his partner is crime. Continuing his 'space man' thing, he sets up a 'space capsule' in the shower stall. Following some ridiculous interview deal (he and she have done dozens of these and not a single one has made the airwaves... telling us what?). Anyways, back to the loons. The interview winds down to his immanent 'lift-off' and into the shower he goes - all dressed as a spaceman. Well something happened - I can't tell what - but it involved a bottle of some sort of tonic he uses? Made? Brought? Whatever. It spilled all over the shower... Elmer slips in this and FALLS solid, out of the shower stall. Is he hurt? No. (rats) What's the problem... The tonic stinks!! Lordy lordy it really stinks. The house is cleared and the HWs find their way into the back yard while Elmer cleans the bathroom.
There's a new crew in town. They call themselves Neils Angels as a take-off of Chalies Angles. These guys and girls are associated with the "Big Brother Fan Club" - the folks that flew a nice banner for the HWs and left them all agog with tears in their eyes (happy HWs). The Angels watch the live feeds, see what the HWs really want (needed Toilette paper the other day) and do their damdest to launch said 'needed goods' inside the wall. It took the form of little care packages floating down under lil'blue and white parachutes yesterday. Two nights ago the Angels catapulted packages of TP all over the place getting some into the yard NONE OF WHICH THE HALF WITTS found.
I've struggled to come up with a good nic name for Ed (the swearing maniac) to no avail… finally, a couple of post'ers from the live feed transcription zone have adopted "Potty Mouth" - I like it. So, Potty Mouth is all work and drunken play lately. I hope he wins this whole show. He has lead the loosers in a few great rounds of drunken baseball in the wee hours. They use the croquet mallets to nail tin cans over the BB wall for a home run... fun to watch for an inning.
Mr Lucky - oops, I mean Mr. Invisible is really keeping low. He managed to avoid the noms but I am thinking he's toast next week (mr. Number 4 - arguably the worst position to be in... so close but A LOOSER NONE THE LESS) Popular opinion seems to think that Elmer and Lipgloss will go as 5th and 4th but I can't help thinking that Lips will stick somehow ... bringing us closer all the time to the scenario this Update began with...

Ahhh look at the time. sorry I gotta go.
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