Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

Corporate Cell Phone Upgrade Plan

My coworkers have all got these groov'en new cell phones that basically do everything but make coffee... and that's proly covered on a page of the manual they haven't got to yet...

They're getting stock quotes, voice activating calls, sending and receiving email...

My cell phone? Well, big analog bell on the back of it was dented back in '72 when they made it...

So the deal is that when my boss calls me into her office to announce the next big ass contract signed for my team... I'm going Robert DiNero (Raging Bull) on my phone with her office door....

In the mean time, I've perfected the exact key stroke combination to all sneaky like program their phones to call home when you flip it open and say "Yo Bitch!" to the phone... ... now it's just a question of waiting for their respective spouses to visit the office so I can ask 'em to "hey check out this cool feature of your husbands phone..."

  • shiver

    You know that shiver you get through your shoulder blades and down your back when you feel cold. Maybe you’ve just left the restaurant and you’re…

  • selfie

    as I read and read and read about "Selfies"... I quietly say to myself... "um... yeah, tell me again how selfies are a new thing." lol. :)

  • Monday, February 17, 2014

    Hiya. :) Today was one of those “oh look… LJ is still there” days. Oh how I miss the old days when LJ was pretty much a playground filled with my…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.