Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

Survivor XVIII Update!!

Survivor XVIII: Tempo Para Sofrer

K, Tyson, is a crazy bastard... Right.

Where in... freak boy, Coach, turns his mania up a notch, Joe is looking like a medi-vac candidate, and Taj is getting hot about the F word. It’s merge time and you’d have thought the big ass “first time in history” exile alliance would come into play... alas (earwax) they are – in fact – all idiots...

Survivor 18... in 481 words...
(aka "The show in as few words as possible")
Team Jalepeno is wallowing in the despair of their own making... “we lost Pow, we’re only Jala” (oh gag!). Coach is all “zen master freak boy” with the water stretching and the shoulder massaging... and apparently NOBODY remembers any of the super-villain stories from their lives and are all incapable of recognizing Coach for the scary monster that he is. Meanwhile, Joe is wandering around with a giant elephant leg (all infected and gross – this does not bode well for Joe). Tree Mail shows up, telling everyone to go, play and eat a “F”east. This excites Taj who, unfortunately, ended up on national television saying “I get excited when ever I hear anything that starts with an F.” This turns out to be the Merge and there is much food and merriment. Brokeback Survivor Boy, JT, is all about letting new alliances show up and his evil plot is revealed with “I’m just ehre to make sure everyone hates one another.” Ar ar ar... Coach makes another of his sound bite moments about honesty and crap and then promises JT he’s lips are sealed. Scene-Next? Coach blabbing to Tyson about talking to JT. (of course). They call themselves “Forza” which may mean something about strength but only manages to sound like “Foreskin” when they say it... They all break into two camps, (Taj, Bren, Sierra – original “Exile Alliance” less Steve-Oh, versus Coach, JT, Tyson, Debby ... and, oh look... there’s Steve-O. He’s playing both sides and this will burn his skinny ass. Erinn and Joe on the outside... and Joe is dying... (leg thing) so this leaves Erinn is either a terrible or wonderful place... we’ll see - but my money is on this working out for her. Immunity is played by climbing a pole that must have included instructions about not touching the top because it sure looks like it would have been easier if they held onto the top. Hold on as long as you can... which turns out to mean not-that-long-after-all. Not sure why more them didn’t kick off their shoes and use their toes effectively (little ledges) but they all fall off leaving Tyson to battle Debby. Tyson wins... and then says “If any ladies want my phone number... just ask.” We all throw up in our mouths a little... and the rinse with mouthwash. Tyson is a sick bastard and has revealed this several times. Taj seems to poop out the last bits of her brain, and appears to have turned on her Exile Alliance and everyone in the new merged tribes jockies for position on the virtual chopping block. Seems like they were going to end up using the “hidden immunity idols” and end up with Sierra on the outs. This, however, does not come to pass as Joe is, in fact, seriously infected and is hauled out of the game, meaning... “no immunity vote.”

Most Memorable Moment
When John was opening up Cameron’s chest to see if her nuke power plant was leaking...
Oh wait... never mind.

Joe looked at the camera... and the editors missed it. But I saw it. You very very rarely see that on this show.

The winner...
Hmm... now I’m thinking Tj or Erinn. Seriously...

The Pitt
(aka "Tribal Council")
Oh look... no pit. Thanks Joe.

Two Things...
~ “Loved Ones” episode is coming ...
~ Sierra needs to wise up or she’s toast... but she seems to have a horseshoe well placed in her bum... so we’ll see. :)

  • shiver

    You know that shiver you get through your shoulder blades and down your back when you feel cold. Maybe you’ve just left the restaurant and you’re…

  • selfie

    as I read and read and read about "Selfies"... I quietly say to myself... "um... yeah, tell me again how selfies are a new thing." lol. :)

  • Monday, February 17, 2014

    Hiya. :) Today was one of those “oh look… LJ is still there” days. Oh how I miss the old days when LJ was pretty much a playground filled with my…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.