Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

Survivor XVII Update!!

Survivor XVII:



OMG



Where in... the happy little pimples living in Camp Castration give the producers their bestest wet dream in for-ever, with a total squeaker of an immunity game and - no question - the greatest take down in the history of the show. I'm talking... in a class with the fans-versus-favorites ill-conceived tied-together-on-an-obstacle-course challenge level of great.



The Sizzle
(aka "The Flashy Quick Review)
Nobag Tribe, or as I like to call it, Camp Castration, is all about the hate vibe with one tribe divided into folks who totally hate Randy and people who appear to not be smart enough to also totally hate Randy... which includes Randy... so yeah... two groups. :) We were thinking Bob was on Team Randy but he was lassoed by Sugars golden-lariat and made to tell the truth... he spills to her about the fake idol, and sets in motion the mouse trap that captures a giant dick. But first... Reward. It's the auction game with 500 dollars, no sharing and no pooling. Step one... Kenny sends Bob to exile and takes his money, Sugar and Randy eat well, Corinne gets a clue for immunity and then Randy gets a plate of cookies that he turns into a pissing match with Sugar - who stunningly wins with great projection and control. While Orville goes on his spirit walk at Exile, Menza-Man Randy sets in motion his big plan: Be a total dick, then use the idol that Bob is going to bring back to cancel my votes so we can send Susie home. Good plan... but it kinda rests on the idea that Orville found an idol on his two trips to Exile... an idol that Sugar must then not have found on her six trips to Exile? Randy does a great job of being a massive dick head. Immunity is balance-beam-over-and-over with bags of wooden blocks, then (step two) make a big tipping-domino thing along a tippy track. Corinne gets a pass to step two and plays against Kenny and Johnny Test er... Matty, with the domino thing. It's frigg'en neck-and-neck, right down to the final tipping domino that sets the immunity necklace on Kenny's shoulders. And then, with Bob back at camp, Sugar talks to him about offering his fake idol to Randy. Sweet mother of grace... * ...words fail me. :D It was a moment the producers and editors must have universally wet themselves over. He says he will, Randy does, Bob does and there you have it... one angry mob at Jeff's Camp Fire, dissing the hell out of each other, then laying it on thick at the "secret ballot counter"... Hell, Crystal was actually YELLING her "diss" as she wrote out Randy's name... bwwahaha... everyone at the circle could hear. Then... dear god... then Jeff offers to accept an idol and I thought Sugar and Crystal were going to freaking explode. Randy gives it... Jeff does his build-up speech thing but ends it with "This is not an idol." ... and Randy feels the full force of a planet sized kick in the nadz. Votes are read and Randy's dead. g-bye! He was pissssssssed. It was fan-fucking-tastic. Just grand. :)

The Spit
Made me grrr: Randy and Corinne exchanging "I hate these people." speeches in the woods outside of camp...
Made me laugh: Randy saying "It looks like an idol to me."

The Fire
Can you just see Charlie back at Camp Loser? Running in circles around Marcus, saying "So Spike... whadda-ya wanna do today? Huh Spike?".

The Shit
Corinne looking a lot like ET when she's under the zombie-night-time-video feature.
Seriously... I laugh every time I see "Nobag" on the screen...
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