Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

Big Brother Weekly Update!!

This Week In Big Brother 10: Back to Basics





Where in... we are treated to a moment of strange freakyness when Stripper Girl (April) decides that the other girls are trying to win because... wait for it... she’s prettier than they are. Then she makes a face!!

I mean... dude! How freaking scary is that?
Check out the box connected to her back by that big tube... I wonder what it's pumping into her?



Loser say what?
(aka "The week in as few words as possible")
This week seems to have been all about the transition of Jerry from Old Man to Old Fart, with April along as his shit-streak. Sorry, but those two are painfully annoying! Jerry is the official torch bearer of the "You have disrespected me" lament that Jessy was so adept at while Michelle sets about her revenge thing - but it’s not personal. The run up to nominations is nothing but blue fire shooting out of everyone’s asses as they scream and yell at each other. Meanwhile, Dan is sitting back watching the shit flow and counting his lucky stars. Michelle gets her letter-from-home and it’s pretty much an "ahhhh puke" moment. Memphis tries to call out what a load of crap the posing is in the "come see my HoH room" but it doesn’t go far... They play a food-game with old season house guests... they totally suck, but there was this moment when April pulls a face over Ollie making the squeaky virgin noises at Janelle. (Note: dude, Boogie has gained a few!) Jerry’s never-ending-hard-on for Jessy gets everyone on Slop for Wednesday... one of five slop days following their poor performance. Memphis gets a ‘talking to’ from Michelle and all I can think is "man, she just voted to kick you out? How can she make like you owe her?" She noms Libra and her enormous ass along with Keesha and her enormous... er yeah, so that Libra has a mouth like a trucker. Have you noticed that Michelle and Jerry dress the same? After so much slop, they finally get a feast and sane-brains use the chance to say some nice stuff about one another to punctuate the meal. Then jerry poops all over everything because he still has his Dan Doll up his ass. Libra tosses Keesha under the bus, so Keesha throws back... everybody fights again... and Dan smiles.Dick Head, er, Jerry, wins the veto and goes to Michelle to have her put Dan up after he uses it. FAIL. Instead, he makes some crazy speech at Dan and then doesn’t use the thing. We get to the live show and Jerry just can’t stop with the dick head stuff. Julie (pump pump pump) keeps trying to give Jerry an opening to clean up his act but again... FAIL. Aprils ego blocks out the sun for a while as she exercises her hate for Keesha – where we get the freeze frame of her oh so pretty face (lol). BB makes Michelle look about 3 inches tall over the "she should have her kids taken away..." comment about Libra with some Libra family stuff (which is a bad sign for Libra if you’re paying attention to the way BB works). Memphis looks like a mass murderer for some reason and they toss Libra out the door. Dan throws another Hoe Game and wig-lady gets to play house for a week.

Fav Quote
"Screw you people!"... and in one fell swoop, Jerry is reduced to a pathetic old screwy bastard.

After nominating two people specifically because she was bummed out huge by their successful effort to kick out Jessy – her show’mance – Michelle pipes up with "It’s not personal." Um...

Most Memorable Moment
Absolutely ... the "It’s because I’m prettier than her" moment from April.

Darwin’s Dessert
Yeah... "Screw you people." And then his veto speech that was pretty much his manifesto-of-hate for Dan... Jerry has sealed his fate as "giant dick head of the year" and he’ll pay for that for the next two years... er... the rest of his life...

Tactical
Jerry, April, Michelle and Ollie
Versus
Dan, Memphis, Keesha, Reeny (see ya libra).
With Reeny as HoH... we can only hope that the nominations maximize DRAMA. Haha.
Where did Ollie get his invisibility cloak?

The winner...
See, Keesha could never get the jury votes and Memphis is ultimately going to get back-doored... So I’m thinking Dan is a lock.
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