Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

Amazing Race 10 Update!!

Amazing Race 10 Update!!

The Legitimate Gladiator

They're off... and racing around Morocco with eyes all focused on cutting one another up, instead of the amazing location. But it's a million dollars... so go figure. Bama's on a roll, although Rob and Kym are definitely not... the pageants continue to be on a mental par with wood chips, and the xdruggies... are just cruising along.

Good Afternoon Race Fans...
(aka "The show, in as few words as possible!")
Wake up early in Keeeeeve, and fly!
~ Morocco by way of Italy or France, depending on your luck. The pageants were in first and got the only early seat... yet a) they all have to bunch up on a connection anyways and b) they get delayed to boot. Hahahaha...
~ and find Ali-baba in the dead of night, manning the back counter in some souvenir shop handing out lucky charms and clues!
~ Find, then camp-out at the Atlas Studio (the sorta place that Herudni V. Bakshi blew up). Fun with the foot race when the gates open. OMG does bama have some thigh action or what? And yeah, running anywhere leaves Bama in the back.
~ make a break for it when the gates open and yield or no yield then clue it to a road block. Pageants in third, yield Bama (good move, IMHO, too bad they blew it by being ... idiots)
~ Road Block is a chariot race that looked wicked!! And reminded us that the xdrugs are... such morons. Dude on the chariot (as a passenger, no less) has to grab these flags to finish and he actually misses one! Pageant girl says "I feel like a legitimate gladiator!" haha... this, of course, in contrast to all the time she's spent feeling like an illegitimate one!)
~ drive 22 kms to some cafe... unless your Rob and Kim... then it's time to stand around looking at a flat tire. Holy crap man... this guy is baaaad luck walking.
~ Detour to "thow a pot" on a pottery wheel (nobody does this... hahaha) or grind up and bag a vat of olives. Only three can play at a time and the idiot girls (pageants) miss the road sign and go forever in the wrong direction... so end up waiting for their turn at the olives.
~ boogy to Cap'n Big Hands and see who's lucky and who's luckier! Bama Edit: geez, I thought bama had it, but alas, it was the xdruggies had the lucky'est charm and get a top-of-the-line advertisement... er... prize from Sprint with some hand held text messaging job that neither of them will ever use except to show other cleaning ladies. And last place? Goes to the pageant queens... aka... freaking twits. But they luck out with a non-elimination week and scrape by "Marked for Death"... um, elimination.

The Good
Holy crap... Bama finding the souvenier shop first and hitting the first place stride? That's amazing. They took the time to check road maps and get their shit together ... and you'd think, with a million on the line... the others would be at least this smart?

The Bad
Dudes all spending sooo many cycles bumm'en on the pageants making the connecting flight... These guys all have a nasty chip on the collective shoulders over the pageants trying to win.

The Ugly

The Exceptionally Pathetic
Bama: "Well, they have to live with that..." like the pageants are supposed to endure some emotional scar for yielding them? Um... yeah. Right. What's a cubit?
Did you see that close up of little'bama smiling? Holy scary evil freaky smile yo!! Ahhhhh!

The Losers
The absence of a brain often outweighs the presence of ... other lovely attributes. As is made most clear with the freaking idiots that the pageant queens are... They are their own worst enemies.

The Winners...
God... the xdruggies may yet win... what with their under the radar crap going strong. But I still want the pageants to win and most definitely do not want to see the cleaning ladies win... although, I suppose I'd sooner that then Rob and Kim. Dude is such a hard core unlucky loser, ... it would mess with his karma to win something like this.
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