Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

Amazing Race 10 Update!!!

Amazing Race 10 Update!!

The Flaming Lewanda’s

And they're off... zinging around south east asia, with a stop in Bejing and off to the land of milk, honey, Agent Orange and The Hanoi Hilton. It’s time to play frogger with Vietnam traffic and if you’re a stupid homophobic tool... you can get taken advantage of by anything yellow in a skirt.

Good Afternoon Race Fans...
(aka "The show, in as few words as possible!")
Enough of this Mongolia crap... Lets hit Vietnam and part-eh!
~ Early risers off to a travel agent that doesn’t open ... till everyone shows up.
~ Fly to Hanoi
~ find your way from here to there... you know, with maps, cabs, and advice... unless you’re Daddy Duke... then ... ok wait, I’ll get to that in the "pathetic" section...
~ Roadblock selling flowers from a bicycle, and note: blond hair and breasts ... really makes this a snap.
~ Off to the village of Vac, except for the cyborg... they’re playing the "wrong bus" game.
~ cross busy roadways and don’t get run over. No really. Hello?
~ Detour : Fuel or foul? Yeah, everybody does Fuel, except daddy idiot duke who does foul only because he can’t find the fuel game. Then a fifteen anvil fell out of the sky and landed on his head, squashing him like a bug... er... well, ok... but it could happen. Idiot dad makes a bird cage with the muff diver while everyone else packs coal mud into weird little burner bricks.
~ watch the Flaming Lewanda’s cry, twitch and generally excreet while they burn off a 30 minute penulty for ... sliding in close to a little vietnamese boy on a giant vibrating... um... motorcycle.

PS. And they didn’t spend any time showing us the devistation that all that Agent Orange has done to the population in Vietnam... gee... I wonder why?

The Good
K... it would have been fun if the Flaming Lewanda’s had decided to build the bird cage... right? Lol... ok... fine.

The Bad
It will be great when Rob finally snaps and we get to watch him chase Kimberly all over the place with a tire iron... hahaha... geez woman, shut the hell up!!!! "Don’t hit that dog!!" as they’re driving... um... he’d have to hop the curb and chase it sugar... what’s the problem? Although... wasn’t it her that almost got run over when they all started playing frogger?

Could the two "single moms" look any more like cleaning ladies?

The Ugly
Watching the Flaming Lewanda’s crying on the penulty mat while their 30 minute punishment for hopping on a moped was a treat... too bad team "Duke and Muff Diver" didn't get back in time... then we could have watched them melt completely. They are sooooo undeserving, it just makes me sick. I was hoping the Pagent Girls were gonna tell us their "talent" was ultimate fighting and then kick the crap out of the sweaty, balding fagshomothex-uals after they kicked up a fus because the girls got their airline tickets before them (thanks to the boys just walking past the available travel agent, then bitching because the girls took their place.) Sadly, they didn’t and we had to watch one of the flamers yelling about their flowers in the Roadblock. Seriously... stap these boys to the floor and tatoo big red "L"s on their foreheads. Ug.

The Exceptionally Pathetic
Daddy duke meets a little asia piece of tail on the airplane and decides she’s his best ticket. Daughter knows best... but, daddy shit-for-brains a) doesn’t listen and b) is way to proud to admit that he’s ... got shit for brains. Kim (local skirt) starts by asking Duke to "you wait here for me" ... and he does... even though every other team walks past, hops in a cab and takes off. Hahaha... So she eventually shows up and while he thinks she’s gonna help... she’s really just snagging a free ride. "oh no... we go to my brothers first... 30 minute... 30 minute..." bwahahaha... Geezus, daughter wanted to push Kim out the window but daddy? No... he actually lets this shit happen and then tries to put on a good face. Un-Be-lievable!!!

The Losers
Bu-bye daddy homophobe. Seriously... the man is a tool and he has a older gay man beard at that... J He lost because he’s just not smart and his attractive, intellegent, tolerant and obviously loving daughter gets kicked off the show along with him. Bummer.

The Winners...
The Asian boys are just sappy enough to be the boys that take home the cash.

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