Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

pull my finger...

Ok... totally TMI.
Kinda gross... if you keep reading...
it's yer own fault.

you know... you know those kicken "bleet" like farts you gotta work at?
not the slow buggers that stink up a room or the ones that seem to be
the reason they chose the word "flatulence" ... but the, sitting
on the john and straining
and then... POW thing. Heck, you even feel
a gust of wind on your ass cheeks sometimes. Yeah... that kind.
Well you know how... er, like, how you're lucky, sometimes to be on
the john when you do those... because you kinda... blast a little nugget
out with the POW? (and if you're exceptionally unlucky, it hits the water
and sends a rebound drip right straight back up to your puckered little
sphincter?
k, so we have the picture... well, the "idea"... forget any pictures you're
getting!
Now translate that into a burp.
I had a Jamaican patty for lunch. It was yummi.
I had some coke too... (A rare treat).
Now I want to burp. Not a gravelly, commuter train burp, but a chest out,
arms back, head up, and mouth wwwwwwide open BARRRRP.
... but I can't.
It wont come.
... and I'm worried if I try too hard... I may send a horrific nugget out
with it.

Such is my dilemma.
pull my finger?
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  • shiver

    You know that shiver you get through your shoulder blades and down your back when you feel cold. Maybe you’ve just left the restaurant and you’re…

  • selfie

    as I read and read and read about "Selfies"... I quietly say to myself... "um... yeah, tell me again how selfies are a new thing." lol. :)

  • Monday, February 17, 2014

    Hiya. :) Today was one of those “oh look… LJ is still there” days. Oh how I miss the old days when LJ was pretty much a playground filled with my…