Big Brother 6 Update!!
Return of the Jedi
Where in... the leaky Cuban leaks, the Jedi get the lights out, the most annoying voice in the history of Big Brother comes to slut things up a bit and the incredible exploding face of the GMG convinces Maggie to do yet another stupid thing. Oh, and the jury house gets to come out of the closet.
Loser say what?
(aka “The show in as few words as possible”)
It's BB, the accelerated edition... and Julie's here to usher another loser to the place where Jen sharpens her fingernails. Someone had fun spraying those pants on her but it's too bad they didn't take an extra moment to hack that piece of hair off her forehead. The show kicks in with Ivette bawling - what else is new - over having lost HoH to the Jedi. BB plays along and Howie gets a set of light sabers in his HoH Price Is Right Showcase. The lights go off and the Jedi get to work with Howie warming everyone to be careful (hahaha!). Annoying Holly from BB5 (with the unimaginably terrible vocal stylings of a helium breathing gerbil with a megaphone) shoes up to emcee the veto game wearing fish net butt cheeks and little else, because... everybody plays! It's a shabby roll-the-house-trivia-dice "Craps" game... and Maggie pulls off a win. Now it's all about Maggs, the fags and a veto. If she rescues someone then April's up!! bwaahahaha... Ivette is crying at Maggie, and April is absolutely bawling at Maggie so Maggie goes ahead... and does nothing. Alien Head Beau gets the business end of the boot and goes off to referee Jen and Rachel at the Smack Down Palace but not before Julie finally gets to say "Hello Beau, drop your bag." . With him out of the way it's time to do a few freeze frames on Julies facial expressions (more fun than you might think) and then it's all girl on girl action for the head Ho. It's down to Maggie and Ivette and the Leaky Cuban gets it... but was Maggies non-guess guess of 1 a trick to win or a gimme for Ivette?
Maggie: "I've been thinking about who I want to be sitting next to at the end of this... and it's none of you!" bwaaahahahahahahahahaha.... *cough*... hack... bwahahaha... hahahahaha... hahahahaha... (imagine this going on for a few pages ...k?) She says this to April who expels about two liters of various liquids out through parts of her face and appears to both shrivel and puff up at the same time.
"she has the worst soul I've ever seen!". Well forget that crap about a virgin mary in the grilled cheese sammich!!! The leaky Cuban can see souls!!! or was that sole and does Janelle just have really crummy shoes?
Darth Howie: "Ohhhhhhhhh! That's the way the real ones come on!"
Most Memorable Moment
The rolling eyeballs and annoyed faces on the house-mats as they endured Holly's voice were good... and the explosive crying from April as Maggie tortured her was outstanding... but the light sabers in the HoH room with the lights out... was a first.
So was Maggie’s guess of "1" for the final tie breaker question - the answer to which would be "the closest without going over" - an effort to win when Ivette guesses too high? or was she being maggy-nanamous with letting The Mouth win?
And frying April would have been a better plan... haha.. which would have been just hilarious. As it is, there was real fun to be had watching April keep here eyebrows in place and not bawl as she voted for Beau.
Ivette puts up Janelle and Howie and Janelle goes.
If the veto is used, up goes April but Janelle still leaves.
So what the hell is Howie still doing in this game?
It sure looks like a "friendship" player (aka Mind Numbingly Stupid Person) will win the money. gah!
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