Amazing Race 7 Update!!
Part Two: Oh Look... A Car Crash... zoomzoom....
It's all about... the way Ramber fell from grace. It's part two of marathon Amazing Race night and the fun never stops... Lynn and Alex burn Ramber, Ramber reminds us they suck, the Stoners flip their jeep and we realize Rob and Amber both need to get to Oz and find the Wiz... 'cuz there's nothing but stale air in those tin man costumes.
Good Afternoon Race Fans...
(aka "The show, in as few words as possible!")
The sprawling expanse that is Soweto:
~ start times land them in two groups for a morning game of "don't get eaten by the lion". They're off on a safari to toss hunks of dead animal at hungry lions.
~ Broke, bloody, and destitute, Meri and the Zombie beg from the other players... who are generally good sports... and then there’s Ray and Rob. NO SOUP FOR YOU.
~ then it's fly time... off to Batswanna... plains, trains and automobiles... er... buses... to find a giant clay ant-eater.
~ So far, so good... except then they have to chuck a spear at a swinging bag in a Road Block, and ... Robee can't do it. ar ar ar ... well, he does eventually, but Joyce beats him!
~ it's clue time, and their off to find some out of the way location (d'uh) and spitting water into ostrich eggs or pounding corn. The Detour.
~ again with the "so far, so good" and then the Stoners roll their jeep and the camera man gets injured. The Flamers stop to help and drop from second to ... almost last for their effort. All the other players stop and either get out or roll down the window to talk... except ... (as if you need to be told) for Rob and Amber. They just cruise on past.
~ Pounding corn turns out to be a royal pain in the ass, where as sucking and spitting water into those eggs... is easy beans. POW-Ron and her highness grab first... (and get squat for a first place prize, btw) beating Ramber by mere seconds.
~ The brothers come from behind, blowing water in the Detour and end up in a foot race against Scary Ray and Freaky Deana. She’s looking worse than bad and he just kept getting more horrible camera angles. The boys win the race and Phil chucks Ray and Deana.
Kelly, the pageant queen, is all good because the scene-from-next-week has her calling Ron a "piece of trash redneck." See "Ugly" below!
Lynn and Alex get all kinds of atta-boys for the stopping to help thing... but extra big claps on the back for holding their nuts telling Rob and Amber to get their own fucking cab... well, not in those exact words... but still.
Deana and that eye thing of hers...
And Rob with "Meredith and what’s his name..." ... Dude doesn’t even know the names ... or genders of the other players!!!!! !!!!
This would be POW-Ron... who comments upon seeing some lightening, "it’s just like bombing downtown Baghdad."... nice. Or on the safari, to Kelly, "If he [lion] jumps on me Kelly... I’m throwing him you." wayyyy nice.
The Exceptionally Pathetic
No contest. Phil, on the floor mat with some freakazoid general dude that I think was saying Zig Heil, but I could be wrong, looks Rob in the eye and asks him if he saw an accident on the road... and then "So you left ‘em at the side of the road?" and the air was as thick as sea poop! Robs stock just had it’s black Tuesday man.
Finally... somebody really awful is tossed off the show! From first place with the new cars to absolute last and kicked off !! Good bye Roy and Deana... and while your busy never having anything to do with Roy again, get that eye looked at!
Ron and Kelly... yeah, whatever.
Still root’en for the Stoners!
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