Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

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Another Survivor Update!

Season of the Colbi-nator

Can this get better…? Well, sure… right about the time they show Nick (the useless goob) getting consumed by a crocodile… and they send a helicopter in to gather up the remaining bits and fly 'em back to the CBS base camp. I'm figuring he (Nick, err, Mr."once you've tasted black you never go back") was lounging about in his only contribution to the OG camp - the rock slab bench, when a hungry crock that - well - just happened to have eaten black before, crawled up to the camp, saw Captain Useless and "never went back"! (Ms Silver Panties prol'y laid a trail of fish entrails from the beach to his rock-slab-bench… a little pay back.)

No seriously, at least this will even things up a bit. There is no way on this planet or any other that Silver Panties or Coconuts was the object of the accident so that leaves it at two boiz and two girlz… which is a dam sight better than the Colbinator is gonna be after Scary and her underfed slave amber-anorexic work out how to kill of Chief Pierre. Than it will be Cheese Boi, Mrs. Brady, Baby-Spice, and Scary-Spice. He is gonna be seriously out chromosomed… and in need of serious butt watching…

Sure, we know that Mrs. Brady wanted to off Scary but she's just gonna end up a target…

Scary: "I have no power over you… so you must die."

When the Ogs were busy with the Maze, winning their first challenge in years (ok, so it only feels like years) did you notice at the very end, Mrs. Brady ran madly off in the wrong direction? Did you hear the Colbinator scream at her! His voice betrayed him… Scary will be able to sway him to the dark side.

Can you believe how tense it is in the land of no food? How many indignities does Chief Pierre have to suffer before he grows a backbone?

Scary: "You! Lazi slave boi… go bury the dead fish bits at the end of the beach… go!!"

So bottom line on the Ogs? Scary is still in charge… Colbi is nothing more that a catnip stuffed GI Joe doll. He will be drooled over, swatted around, bitten and ultimately torn apart by the rat with the sharpest claws…

Moving over to the KUS:
The Hatchling: "There was a little fire in my woolie!"
Everybody is trash'en everybody and everything…

Mike (crazed gone-native dude) trashing The Mouth: "when other girls put on a different shirt you see a tan line. When kimmi puts on a different shirt you see a dirt line…"

Coconuts trashing Ms Silver Panties: "Alicia is in charge of telling people what to do… She's in charge of talking trash about other people." (wtf?)

And the ultimate quote from this episode!! The Hatchling (Jeff) trashing the bleeding hearts: [on winning] "Screw it… I mean, chop their heads off, chop their legs off… I'm ready to chop their heads off and those eyeballs out so Mike can eat 'em."

Gone-Native-Dude (mike): "I feel the need to shed some blood"

Yes Mike is going to have some real problems when he gets outta here.

Remember on The Mouths first night? She was concerned about not being able to self-stim! One wonders if she collapsed in a heap clicking her mouse to beat the band after being thrown over the cliffs of despair. Having proven herself to be utterly useless to the team by not even participating in challenges the others win, and stink'en up the joint, The Mouth is finally silenced. Thus proving that boobage will only get you so far.

The editors made us briefly think Ms Silver Panties was gonna get the boot, but it was clear that would be a bad move from a strong team point of view. Going with that theory, they should have by-passed the whole vote thing at council, grappled Nick and hucked him over the cliff… At least The Mouth was boiling water and providing entertainment at meal time.

Unless he was dinner for some crocodile Jeff is still my pick for emerging evil lord on the KUs.

Add Scary and you have a sort of "Bride of Frankenstien" thing happening.
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