Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

Amazing Race 5 Update!

Amazing Race 5 Update!!

Owe... my leg

It's all about...  me being on holidays. :D Mirna spits like she's thinking of that last overweight trick, and Charla comes up with Arabic like it's nothing (wtf?). The Rosie’s are legless, begging for alms on the sidewalk, and the Daryl’s? well, they still have legs, but watch as they crumble.  Team CC (Colin, Christie) hold their lead (which drops from several hours to about 40 minutes when they sit waiting for a shrine to open), but Colin could get dysentery or something and I wouldn't be all broken up about it.

(just a quick recap)

Technically Speaking...
Wake up and get out of my pyramid...
~ Road block! Pick someone that can handle a low tunnel (hi Charla) and head to the "geological center of the earth" (as per ancient Egyptian beliefs),
~ clue it from the "chamber of creation" to the "mound of creation" (and I'm biting my tongue against the "mound" jokes...)
~ find way to Luxor, and it's Air Port hi-jinx time again.
~ Luxor is a Detour moving sheep or hauling water.
~ then a dig sight to search through a couple of hundred square feet of sand for a fist sized carving of a bug... (scarab... which reminds me,... have you seen "Buba Ho Tep"? bwaahahaha.... )
~ find yer bug and get to the checkpoint.

The Good
Despite getting totally fucked by some random dumb ass cab driver that takes them to the wrong airport, my girls (The Rosie’s) are doing fine.  It looked like their last legs were getting hacked off but a little delay in a flight works wonderfully to put them back in the game... They manage to score enough cash begging on the street to get cabs and possibly donuts and make it to the checkpoint. :)

The Bad
Colin, who has must really be enjoying the sensation of that horse-shoe rammed up his ass, comments when he finally unearths his scarab in the mini-dig "We finally get lucky!" Dude... you've been made of luck in this game. Example:  your lovely date didn't ram a spoon full of caviar into your eye a few episodes ago!

The Ugly
"I think Colin is jealous of me..." bwaahahahaha. Mirna lives in a very special reality.  Hopefully it's one that will include several of the players, lead by Charla, kicking the snot out of her in an airport... like three seconds after the cameras stop rolling when the game ends. She is getting more and more ignorant as the game goes on... following a hooker "all is fair when money is at stake" moral code.

The Exceptionally Pathetic
One of the Daryl’s... I think it's Marshal, has a bum leg.  Now add; Is overweight, totally out of shape, and wants to blame the world for anything that goes wrong with his day, and this quickly adds up to his leg giving him real trouble.  Oh, walking across Bum Fuck Egypt and kinda makes it worse too. :D  Well, anyways the dick-smack New York pizza boys from Texas LOST the game.  They freaking quit... Dude couldn't find his bug in the mini-dig so, instead of finding out that maybe this is another of the "non elimination" rounds, they just give up like the hopeless losers they will always be remembered as.  Good Riddance.

The Losers
Well... the Daryls of course. They get the first ever DNF in the shows history.

Checked Flags and Crystal Balls
I'm losing faith in the Rosie’s.  They are definitely pulling it together after their total fuck up last week but I dunno if they have what it will take. I keep expecting them to stick it to the twins a little harder.  So, if it's not the Rosie’s? I suspect Chip and Dale may take it way from Team CC.  Oh, and I'm thinking something is going to totally fuck Mirna and Charla - despite the unbelievable luck they keep having.

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