December 15th, 2000


(no subject)

Hey. Ok another remote update from the hand held. I'm sitting at a board table with all the big cheese types from the company I work at... actually it's kinda cool, cause I kinda feel like a kid all the time... you know, I look at coworkers that are my age and they look like adults to me - "adults" in contrast to me. So any ways, I'm a technical manager in this company... a big ass multi mega million dollar company and they treat me like I belong at this board table... Sometimes I feel a bit like a big faker! Like, how the heck am I getting away with this? Don't get me wrong, I'm (all humbleness out the window) a freaking genius at what I do but it comes easy... so I always feel like I've snuck in to meetings like this. I just finished giving them a 45-minute presentation and they're all take'en notes and asking questions - cool. Of course, it's a Friday, so everybody is dressed like a slob! gotta love casual Fridays.

So, they bring in the donuts and I'm on my 5th... and getting much teasing about the fact that I'm eating a fifth donut. I weight like 170 on a heavy day... 165 normally and I'm 5'10" (I'm clearly not a fat boy - although I get a little self conscious about not having "abs of steel" but does anybody? - and if a whole bunch of people do, don't tell me, let me live all naive, ok!) Ok, so I'm going for the number 5 donut - it's a filled donut, you know all icing-sugar on the outside... I'm about to look like a cocaine addict for the rest of the meeting... see ya later lj.
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(no subject)

Days of Christmas (2)

On the First day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
a pure evil, pure white cat - I called it Satan. Then she left me.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...
two grams of pot! She felt awful about the 'leaving' thing and wants me to take her back, so she showed up with a little baggie and brandishing a big ol'hickey I know nothing about! hmmmm...
Oh, and Satan, the dam cat, basically lives under my big comfy chair.
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(no subject)

Ok, so this is another cramped deal. Bus and typing... hopefully who ever sits beside me will have showered since shoveling their laneway....

Story time: The story of Curtis. (a sad ending but very goofy story!)
The Cats:
Zebra and I were cat people before we became people people... that is to say, we always had a cat and treated it like a member of the family. Then we had kids. Now we treat the kids like members of the family and the cat like a pet. The current cat - you've seen her with the big pink Band-Aid on her tail a while ago - is Buster. We got buster in a moment of weakness while walking through a pet store. I will not go into a pet store any more... except with the kids... not with Zebra (LOL). Buster came after Curtis. Curtis we had as a kitten while we still had Buddy. Buddy was the cat I got for myself while I was in Collage. She was a doll... she grew up sleeping on my desk while I studied. She was right at home being stuffed into my back pack and going on walks... Buddy got old. buddy had to be put down and I cried like a little baby in the car outside of the vet clinic... But we had Curtis. and Curtis was a piece of work.
The Cat:
On the morning that Zebra and I met with my buddy in the parking lot of a McDonalds to go white water rafting... fun fun fun... Z and I spotted a little grayish black tail bobbing in and out between parked cars. I casually walked up to this weee tiny kitten that had been running from everybody that came near and she let me get right in her face and pick her up. I walked her around the inside of the McDonalds looking to see if anyone claimed ownership, but there were no takers. So I took little miss home, put her in the basement laundry room with a bowl of milk, closed the door, and went back to McD's to get going on the adventure with water.

We had a blast. Our boat was being steered by a dude named ... Curtis, so we named the cat after him. Curtis was a remarkable cat... I've had cats all my life and I'm quite used to the little cute things they can do. But Curtis was different. She went on these great huge long walks with us... all the neighbors loved her to tears. She was a real pal when George was born... She'd sleep on the floor beside the babies cradle and if the baby stirred or started to cry Curtis would come and get Z or I... sure we had a baby monitor, but she'd still want to personally see to the babies care!!!.
We took Curtis on canoe trips into Algonquin Park. I love canoe trips, I hate portaging... but I can't usually get one without the other. She'd scare the crap out of raccoons that tried to infiltrate our camp... just hilarious. We'd pull up to a site and as soon as the canoe was over ground, she'd hop out and take off. We would be lucky to see her again before morning. But when it was time to go… she'd be there. Where buddy was my cat, Curtis was more like Zebra's cat…
The Agents:
Z and I were in the process of making Ed. Well Z was making Ed and I was watch'en her do it! George was underfoot and we wanted to move into a bigger house. We had bought that house through cube lady. We call her cube lady because she basically… was a cube. Middle of winter, she's picking us up to go look at houses. She just fills the front bucket seat of her T-Bird? She had these teeny little feet and would basically be wearing pumps in the snow cause she could slip 'em on and off easy … if a shoe needed to be touched by hands to be on her foot… it was going to have to be somebody else's hands. Any ways, she played us like the first time home buyers we were and we weren't going back to her this time! Then there was the Spaniard.
The Agent:
Rodolfo! I knew this guy from work and thought I'd do him a favour and list with him. Nice guy. Big mistake. Ok he did what he's supposed to do. But he was usually late and we were getting nowhere. On the lovely Saturday in question it was sunny, warm day. Zebra and I were waiting for the Spaniard to show. He was supposed to be doing an open house. We're on the front porch. Zebra is 5-6 months pregs. We see Curtis across the street stretching and preparing to come home. We live on a corner… around this corner comes the Spaniard doing the full 40km around the 90 degree turn. Curtis was half way home. Curtis never made it. Zebra watched this go down. Not a squish, but … I ran for the cat, grabbed her, and Z and bolted in the car to the animal hospital acting like a total twit as I drove. However, it was done!
Can you imagine this? We were crushed, Z was amazingly crushed.
When I got home he was gone. Never had to see him again. We changed companies, etc. and ended up with another bizarre character… most real estate agents have a strange, strange, dark side.
Got Curtis.
Now that I write this I feel a little bad for dredging up a sad story… but it's an old story and sad as it was it's a past tense kind of a thing… no worries.
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