Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

  • Music:

Morning ...



Wow... Ok. Somebody go kidnap Mother Nature and stuff her in de-tox for a while... that or put a few grams of lead in the back of her crack addled head... Bitch! Sun, rain and lovely weather for the holiday season, and the day I have to go back to work, it's white out conditions, driving in little grooves on the highway, freezing rain on top of blowing snow and wind that makes my little honda move SIDEWAYS while I'm toodling along the commute to work. Geezus.

wearing
~ red stripee ftls
~ blue jeans [ :: it's a new year... you'd think I'd grow out of this... but nooooooooo :: ]
~ the shirt you see in my icon... it's my first p-z shirt... it's about 4 years old... and er... I like it .. .ok?
~ big comfy new christmas sweater. :D
planning
~ well I'm at work... I could run with scissors here yo! and only be a danger to myself... (~ yells "Hullllo?"... hears pins drop)
~ set up a series of slides for a show about a new tool (that I designed) called "OV-Heartbeat"... it integrates in REVERSE an ARS server with HP OV so that someone gets paged if the OV server vanishes from the network.
~ split at lunch to go to the doctor... and don't get me wrong here... I've no fear of doctors or what they tell me... let alone lab technicians that want to slather warm lubricants on me... :D
~ grocery store and then home...
~ I feel a cake coming on... I wanna make one of those deep choco tortes (?) ... the almost "flourless" deals that are so richly chocolaty that your arms fall off when you enter the room with it as your body tries to stop you for ramming the whole thing down your throat... you know... one of those... :D
wishing
~ you knew dorkgirl... she lives in Alaska... she posted a link to a friends web page with some images from her recent train ride home... [ :: this is my fav :: ] (awesome picture and please note that it is the property of the web mistress at http://sunhusky.com/ )
~ for sweet relief to find my friend kaeren...
~ that faith in people and all that goes with it finds it's way to the heart and mind of one of my most favourite met-her-in-person lj friends ever... indianasweetie
~ for the amazatron experience that my brotha allyn is having on the other side of the planet continues to light up his mind and his life.
~ to just send some wow vibes to my sweet friend jennfromtx... just because...
~ that seepingsilver, an amazing mom with more than a full plate... gets a little sleep. :D
~ and some more "just because" wishes for karma explosions to rock my sugar towanda ...

Man... I had a great sleep last night... dunno what it was or what I was dreaming about but it must have been good. I was just very relaxed and comfortable when I woke up. Granted I woke up tired and groggy, but still.
Have you ever felt that uncomfortable in your own skin thing? I get that way sometimes when I'm getting dressed for work... and suddenly hate almost all of my clothes and realize the ones I still like are in the wash... Whatever causes it... and it's usually not clothing but just a sense of sudden loss-of-self-confidence... it can be really paralyzing. I remember being in San Fran on that conference years ago and ditching the pool playing buddies I was with to go dancing. I ended up in a bar called either Kitties or Bondage-A-Go-Go, depending on what night of the week it was... and my only purpose was to dance the night away. I bought the one drink I would have that night and proceeded to feel abysmal. I was self conscious and awkward. Like I had a dozen rolls of toilet paper stuck to my feet and a sign on my back that said "dork". Then I remember sitting down and considering my options... "Feel this way and stay", "Feel this way and go", or "Get the fuck over it". I walked onto a mostly empty dance floor when a good song came up and closed my eyes. I danced for about 20 minutes before I opened my eyes... I was in a sea of dancing people and that feeling was gone... and quite forgotten.
Never ... ever... give in to the feeling of being uncomfortable in your own skin. Your greatest successes will come to you when you fight it off... and it's your skin... if you can't find comfort in it... how can you expect anyone else to?

143... 143 all over the place yo. :D
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 9 comments