Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

Big Brother 4 Update!!!

Big Brother 4 Update!!

The Power Puff Girls.
Bubbles, ButterCup and Blossom fly through the house fighting crime and saving the city... er... ok, so they just lie their asses off and mentally beat the crap out of the boys. It all amounts to the same thing... The boys are fried and the end game is being played before your eyes.

How the hell did Alison know about the kiss at the MTV video awards? They’re supposed to be cut off right? Well, before Jun comes home Alison comments that she would have "loved to see Madonna kiss Brittany and Missy Elliot slappen asses". WTF?

Loser say what?
(aka "The Show in as few words as possible")
Jealousy runs rampant... expected in the girls... but Rob? Dude’s a bit green there. Alison peels back the skin on her head and reveals to all that there is a tree stump in the space where her brain should be and Erika just gets a little bit more scary every time we see her. Tree-Stump girl gets evil with her duplicitous scheming (go Alison hahahaha) and Jee begins a long session of licking boots and begging. Everybody gets into talking about the X-Factor, and the producers are clinking classes in the production room. Alison keeps referring to Donny as her boyfriend... and then Jun comes home. Needless to say, the girls all scream like a rockstar just handed them his sweaty underpants. Jee does his best to pee on their parade with a little dig to Jun about how the girls were jealous and we are well reminded that it is now the girls game. Bubbles (Alison), Blossom (Jun) and Buttercup (Erika) zooooooom into action plotting the demise of Mojo-jojo (Jee) and his crony (Rob). It’s Mojo-JoJo’s birthday, not that anybody actually gave a crap... oh, he gets a "poison berry pie" and each of the girls offer up a booby squish hug... but still...
BB sees that the fish are bored... swimming around their tank ("Oh look, a plasma tv" pause "Oh look, a plasma tv" pause etc.) so they toss ‘em some wigs, a video camera and we get the best show laugh in ages. They dress up and play at acting like Nathan, Justin, Dana and Jack. Jee playing Justin was fucking priceless.
Jee does a wee bit more begging but Blossom isn’t taking the bate. He tries with Veto girl Bubbles and she almost laughs at him, but she saved that for the diary room. Buttercup collects the keys and makes the noms wearing this butt ugly maternity shirt from k-mart and goes on to make the most tactical play of the season. She should win for this move alone. She noms Alison (veto girl) and Jee.

Fav Quote
"I would love to be there in a suit and all done up... look’en like money!" Yeah, Rob fer sure yo! However, you can dress a weasel up in a tux and in the end... it’s just a well dressed weasel.

Alison, while they all keep talking about Jun and her MTV Video awards deal, comes out with "She was on TV!!!!! On an actual TV Show!!!" ok, is it just me? I mean... hello? Alison Oh My Fucking God Woman! Have you, er... noticed the CAMERAS ALL OVER THE PLACE... geezus!!! Where do you think you are? At band camp? "there was this time, at band camp, when I took a baseball bat..."

Jun nails it with a comment on the house-mats in the Jury House; "I think it’s two couples in there... Dana and Justin, and Nathan and Jack!" bwaahahahaha... I’m telling you Nathan likes cock!

Most Memorable Moment
The gave them a cowboy hat and a housecoat for Dana, a bald head wig for Jack, a big tuft of blonde hair for Nathan and I dunno what for Justin. But Jee brushed his hair down Caesar like, and puts on this dumb expression... I just about shot coffee out my nose. Alison in the Jack head was a scream. This whole segment had me laughing so hard... and it’s about time the show delivered a good laugh, btw!

Jun came home to open her Queen Rat room and get some treats from home. This included a note from the now infamous Bob. I was touched but then again I was stoned and sleep deprived so... whatever. *sniff* LOL. The thing of it is... she comes from the "Bob loves me" zone to nominating Jee. Wohoo... way to play the game Bob. She nominated Alison, who is safe because she has the veto and Jee. This means that she a) didn’t nominate Rob from whom she can now extract favor, b) she didn’t nominate Erika, which leaves the door open for a forced hand to fry that girl and avoid all the associated guilt. Alison and Jun are playing a hulluva game and Alison is playing the BEST. Remember, the point of the game is to win and if that requires you to be an evil horror... well, that makes for good TV so fill yer boots.
There was this segment of Alison talking turkey to Erika and trying to shore up her support from Erika with a veritable flood of tears... it was exceptionally evil and kinda wow.

The winner...
Jun is still the most likeable of the lot and by far and away the best of what’s still in the house. Go go Jun-Jun!

All the BB4 Updates will be available on ....
Corto's Web
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