Big Brother 4 Update!!
An outstandingly terrible looking Julie Robot screws up line after line as she tries to get through the show... helped along by some of the most puerile house-mats ever. At least Alison admits to being a tramp to get Pretty-Boy to do her bidding. I mean, can you just see her on her knees in the locker room after the big game at college?
Loser say what?
(aka "The Show in as few words as possible")
"Tangerine day" in the house of Stick-girl... Her outfit looks like one of those 1960’s pool tables. It’s time for helmet head Julie to walk us through another "Get Yo Bitchy Self Outta Ma House!" show. Open, of course, with Dana needing some cheese to go with that whine. She’s worried it’ll be a 3 – 3 tie and that Alison will get to have her moment in the sun by breaking the tie. Dana does NOT want this. She’s cracked and a bit leaky as she tries to hold onto a nonexistent friendship with Jun. Alison makes promises she unfortunately won’t keep and I swear lightening was going to zap her sorry ass in the diary room. Erika, reveals another layer of her fountain of youth mania, let alone some flesh as she wears her bikini for her diary room sessions. Stick Girl blows some more lines, and we almost see the bolt-ends that she has instead of ears. Everybody talks about Jun skating through the game and worries of her potential victory. This, of course, is the expected miss-direction and Dana gets tossed with a 6 - 0 vote. She’s the first member of the jury, and the first evictee to be insulted on national tv in the "recorded messages from your fellow houseguests" segment. Now she can get a hair cut. Jack throws the competition for King Rat... and is now picking crows feet out of his gums as Justin gets the round bed and snack food. Julie... three for three... screws up yet again (it’s not Shakespeare yo) and we close with Robert figuratively sucking the lint balls off Alison’s feet.
"I swear to god, if that girl stays, I’ll shoot myself in the face and go home." Alas Alison, Dana leaves... so you wont get to do that again!
"Jun? wanna be my best friend?" and then a nice uncomfortable silence for Dana to stew in...
"Dana doesn’t think she’s campaigning ... I’m thinking she’s hit her head." Word ‘em up there Junnie. :D
"It makes me feel like I’m young again..." Yeah... and you are such an old hag now... Spend much time on a leather couch in a swanky office Erika?
"Yes Julie, the bible has helped me, helping me relax and focus on the game." K, now what Ali-gun-shot-face is say’en here is actually "Yes, Julie, I get so freaking numb trying to understand word one in that tomb that I fall asleep."
Most Memorable Moment
Yeah, so after the eviction... after the King Rat game... after asking Jun how it feels to have been saved from eviction (and getting a racist "Ahhh sooo happy" Asian accent answer), and after Julie does her last screw up talking to Jury-duty-girl#1, we are returned to the house for a few minutes of live feed... Alison sits down all bummed about how much of a total shit she figures she must appear (er... walks like a duck...) is consoled by Jee, Robert and Justin. This takes the form of Robert practically getting on his hands and knees to suck her toes, Jee scratching his head and Justin? Justin pipes up with "aw... Alison, don’t start crying..." Get the idea he’s maybe said that before?
Estrogen Is Your Friend
Jun exercises her pissed-off muscles on Dana for a while because Dana is actively campaigning against Jun to save herself, although talks like she’s not, but Jun knows better. Yo! You simply NEVER piss off the cook. Hell, her "see ya" message on tape to Dana was downright nasty. Erika... I mean... nice body but a ferret head nailed to the neck would be an improvement. She takes the time to do a little "I told you so" action on the last gasp message to Dana. Dana’s ride on the pleather bench with helmet head is anything but fun... except for the cream that escapes when Justin gives her a big word hug. Julie asks her some dumb question like "Are you glad you met Justin?" or something... whatever... and Dana starts talking... talk talk talk talk talk... Camera swings back to Helmet Head and she says "That’s nice..." with a face that is just screaming "shut the fuck up you little bitch... this is my show! SMACK!"
Jee, Justin and Rob-the-Moron get serious video time tonight as the "three stooges" are profiled... considering that they were the first three targeted by the now defunct "Original Eight"... they’ve done well for themselves. The thing is, they are textbook. Justin is the leader...Robert is the wimpy little dog jumping back and forth over Justin "Hey Spike..." and Jee is like some punching bag Justin carries around. If he’s not making fun of Jee’s accent or culture, he’s beating on him. We catch a great moment on tape as Justin looses a point in their jury rigged ping pong table, and by accident whips his ping pong mallet (a re-enforced oven mit??) across the room and catches Jee square in the face. Jack? What the hell is up with Agent Idiot? He disqualifies himself in the first 5 seconds of the King Rat game by getting the easiest question dead wrong. Obviously he’s throwing the competition but I’m not sure why? Mr. FBI training never made it to the "how to be subtle" classes at the Academy. Now that Justin, Jacks nemesis, is in the groovy room Jack must just be kicking himself for tossing off so fast.
Ok... so it’s Justin, Jee, and Robert against Erika, Nathan and Jack. Jun is basically the Saigon Ho working both sides of the street and stepping over Alison’s used up body to get back and forth. With Justin as King Rat, that only leaves Jee and Rob as done-deal votes. If he nominates two from the "them" side, he’ll require either Alison or Skank-muffin to firm up the win vote. Oh, and it's "live votes" next week. :D
Still stuck on Jun... you know... like Jun sticks to everything.
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