Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

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The Amazing Race #3

The Amazing Race

So... when you’re out with your hommies... do you pull that "because we are mawwied to professional athalleets" crap with them? ‘Cause honey it’s wearing thin and I’m just getting to know yer sorry ass.

The Good
~ Still in love with the clowns... Jon and Al are too much fun. Now if only they’d tie up Monica and Sharee and shoot them out of a cannon... Oh and as much as it’s fun watching the Married Gay Men crack wit at Skeeter and Weezer (Steve and Josh) I’m kinda linking the father / son dynamic... although josh does look like Jack (Ozzi’s kid).

The Bad
~ Ok.. the fag tag team... chip and dale... er Chip and Reichen (what the hell is a Reichen?) are such wankers. They have terrible chips on their shoulders... like about everything... and I’m not talking about Chip riding Reichen face ... you know, cause what a married couple do in the privacy of their own home is their business. No seriously, they burned themselves up but good with the carriage thang... sending Chipper out to grab TWO carriage tags... and dude pushes Kelly out the way... only to have her heave to and catch his lip with her ring. Cool... bleeding uber buff gay guy taken out by tiny little woman. (and then he comes back to make nice nice... BITE ME.)

The Pathetic
~ Geezus... to have seen the old guy (Steve or Dave?) separate from his calves on the bungy-jump deal ... would have been gross to hitherto unimagined levels but still it would have been totally amazing. At least he could have had some conviction in his voice next time he says "oh my aching legs". Dudes hop on the wrong train.... bwaahahaha They twice asked some zeek for directions... Word! If you’re gonna ask... ask someone that doesn’t look like their address is "under the bench in Haydon Park".

The Sad
~ How sick are we gonna get of virgin girl (Millie) wheezing for her puffer? When will it be ok to start making sexually charged jokes about how she’s constantly sucking on her inhaler. I mean... look at Clown boys hanging back... to help while she pants like Jersey Hooker after a Devils Cup party. Talk about hearts of gold. And do we see her going to any lengths to thank them?

The "oh my god"
~ Could the plastic girls be any more classic? I mean...there’s a wee tiny little suspicion that their arguing is a feint... a ruse to confuse their opponents... but then that would mean they are capable of cognitive thought. As it stands now, Tian is gonna rip Jaree’s hair out and hang her with it if Jaree doesn’t get some her shit out the pack and leave it behind. But you know... she prol’y needs 18 changes of clothes and 36 pairs of shoes for this trip.

The Losers
~ That total freaking bitch... Cindy and her equally pissy non-partner... got tossed because she is such a freaking tard. I could not have been happier with the loser bid last night.! Good riddance.

Nine couples left, gay married dudes, the hot chix, the old farts, the engaged and enraged couple, the virgins (hahaha) The Osbournes, clowns, Professional Athletes Wives. (PAWs?), and the Best Buddies. One team wins a million dollars, several go home pissed off.
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