Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless
corto

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BB3 Update!!

BB3 Update: Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead

The live show... Tears, ducks, a wig, and an eviction. There really is no substitute for brains - andlemmitellya... there doesn't seem to be a single active brain cell in the whole freaking house. Ok, sure Danni-girl is all about being the puppet master but come on!



In Brief
Amy clues in to being used, thanks to the Flaming Flamingo, and the Kill-Roddy plot fizzles. Danny sticks to her guns and votes with her brain and everyone else votes with their sphincters. Gerry thinks he's an alpha male, and Roddy brings the hammer down on the skank muffin. He breaks up with her and then they all toss her over the cliffs of despair. Danielle has a cute-as-hell family. The tramp (Chiara) manages to get lip action from virgin boy on her way out the door. Amy looks hot, and the Virgin gets to be Head-Boy and - of course - he won't be parlaying that into any power sex... because he has no penis.

Some details?
Julie is bald... no question. That's a wig... Bald and flat... wearing a "built in boobs" top. She walks us through another eviction night that, once again, reminds me that these people are so fucking dumb they quite simply deserve to be euthanised after the show.

She asks Jason what has surprised him most about the exp so far and he lies about how it's been all the love in the house... we all know it's clearly the volume of sexual tension he has had to endure... poor boy.

Marcellas wakes Amy from her mindless slumber informing her of the house desire to be rid of Roddy and she loses it... only to be comforted by a bucket of sympathy votes leveled against Chiara, resulting in her ouster from the non-stop Ikea commercial. Thus totally blowing Danielle’s well considered plans.

Roddy calls Chiara out on her amazingly embarrassing behavior... I was stunned that she took it so well. They exchange gifts (where the fuck do these come from); he gives her a book - a thoughtful expression of cerebral integrity on his part which she accepts like it was a barf bag from an American Airlines flight and she gives him a picture of themselves on the hammock. He tried to be gracious as he looked at the ugly shot of himself they used but she saw through that.

The family interviews included in this show were great! We’ve already seen Roddy’s interview’s so we get Gerrys instead. Gerrys family looks like a promo shot of the fucking Munsters... with his daughter (aka Wednesday) looking demonic in the background. Chiara has no one on the outside that was willing to be caught on tape so we get Danielle’s family. They were so damn cute, you just can’t imagine. Adorable kids and her hubby man looks like a super guy... (please please, let Danielle win.)

Fav Quote
"You embarrass me." Roddy, right before he tells Chiara that his feelings for her have reached a "plateau"... as in, he breaks off their little "First Monday in October" romance.

"Your really remind me of my daughter." Gerry, in his farewell speach to Chiara, on the heels of an interview segment with his family in which we see his beast of a daughter, No way BB doesn't put this stuff out there on purpose. When Chiara actually sees his daughter will she remember that he said that?

"Will you be ok while we look for some tissues?" Julie to Chiara... see "most memorable moment" below.

Most Memorable Moment
Ok, they (BB) know the score before the show starts... and there's stick girl (Julie) interviewing Miss. Uber-Tears (Chiara) in the loser lounge and she doesn't have any tissues for her... They had to break away, back to the house, while Julie dug into her bra (which is attached to the lower part of her rib cage, btw – no really there is at least a full foot of space between her chin and the start of her boob bulge) to grab a few kleenex's for Chiara. Like they didn't know they'd need tissue... hahahaa....

Best bit from the Live Feed Transcripts
Marcellas and his freaking duck. This one character quirk alone is enough to make me uneasy about the Flamingo man.

Estrogen
Amy had camera face time first thing in the morning after many tears... and, frankly, she was better looking at that moment then at any other so far. Then, the kicker... (and sorry to be such a "thinking with the little head" guy here, but...) she – Amy – looked like a stone cold fox during the HoH competition, reclining in a directors chair. Just wow. She’s still dumb as a post, but that’s another story.

Danny is all apologizing to Chiara on her way out the door while the rest are trying to ensure it hits on the ass as she passes through.

Lisa? Nope... nothing... it’s like she wasn’t there last night except for Stick Girl putting her on the spot to say how much she liked the Sheryl Crow CD Promo Spot.

Testosterone
Roddy... you lucky little fuck. As the horse shoes come shooting out of Gerrys ass, Roddy must be shoving right up his. I just cannot freaking believe that they didn’t vote him off...

Gerry get’s a video moment and reclines his sweaty self back saying "Roddy is another Alpha Male, as I am. And there can be only one." Of course, he goes on to vote skank muffin out so I dunno what he thought he was talking about with that alpha male crap. What a freaking tard.

Jason wins the HoH game by being better and remembering which evicted house guest to attribute various quotes... The HoH comp was over in seconds, versus the over-time periods it normally goes into, giving us a few extra moments of the house-mats standing around being boring. (can you tell I’m dying for Survivor to start...) Little dickless boy wins HoH and you could just see Danielle creaming herself on the spot. I’m thinking she’s gonna figure prominently in his thinking... as in, she will be doing most of it for him. He actually comes to see her before his vote this week to get a final check from her on how he should vote. Of course they don’t show us her holding his pecker for him while he pees but we all know she does.

Tactical
Tactical? TACTICAL... look, all the dead earwigs in my back yard are a testament to the fact that there is not enough brain matter in this house to come up with a single tactic let alone a considered plan... (excepting Danny girl).

ps. check out http://www.iloveroddy.com where a groovy lj friend is reposting these updates... yeah, I'm gonna be famous. :D (snicker)
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