Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

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Easily the second funniest episode of the Big Brother show ever*. We had to stop the tape, I was laughing so freak'en hard. We have the default eviction / head boy show, with typical arguing, fighting, and plotting house-mats. Add a competition to bring a house-mat back from the dead, twist up the head-boy competition and we have a rocking show!

In Brief
"Hello Mewwwwwwwit!"

100 words?
Julie stuffs. Josh turns to lizards. Marcellas out's the game plan, and Josh blows everything with a bunch of "cat out of bag" stuff. They ALL evict Josh, and Julie guards her ass. BB tortures the potential returnee's and then the house-mats vote in Amy. Including Darth Vader. Lisa votes in Amy over Eric!! Then BB puts 'em all in a big bathtub with some squid. Last one out is Head-Boy/Girl.
Oh, and the show is on Friday night, not Saturday and Sheryl Crow performs during a 2 hour show next Wednesday.

Some details?
As always, Julie Chen looks ridiculous, with each carefully prepared hair clump poking her in the eye - how she doesn't cave in and brush the hair out of her eyes I'll never know. Oh, and I swear she must stuff her bra. She delivers her perfectly rehearsed lines then gets up to walk towards the camera and does this weird sorta walk thing as she twists her bony little ass around... kinda pivoting on her enormous gap. blech.

We get good tv with the gang locking down the requirement to evict Roddy - because he's the strong player that will beat them. Then the chatter starts... it starts with Marcellas outing the issue to Roddy, and then Roddy confronting Josh in front of the group, and Josh, who, up until this very moment was sitting pretty for a pass on eviction night, totally fucking blows it. He picks a killer argument with everyone faster than Rita Macintyre picks her thong strap and the gang must have turned on him. They then go on to vote him out unanimously.

Fav Quote
The show opens with Josh talking trash about Chiara... "Manipulative bitch!" (you're all class there joshie).
Josh to the camera in the Idiot Room: "If I tell one lizard a story, and it's the truth, it won't turn on me and twist the story to everyone else." When all else fails, turn to the lizards for friendship.
Marcellas, on Josh; "Josh is one of the vilest people I've ever met in my life." er.. come on Marci... tell us how you really feel.
Julie, when Josh shows up in the loser lounge; "Josh! don't smack my behind."

Most Memorable Moment
Ok, so the house-mats have to vote between Eric and Amy in the second round competition for re-entry. Each player, sequestered in a different room is told to raise either a red paddle for an Amy vote or a black paddle for an Eric vote, and then asked to vote. When Julie asks Marcellas, she has hardly finished saying Amy when he has the red paddle up ... high... then he sorta tips a bit and DROPS the black paddle on the floor!!!, then puts his hand on his hip wave'en that red paddle around. It was just freaking priceless.

The Dawn of the Dead
So bringing a house-mat back... was cool. I, honestly, really enjoyed watching this segment... BB runs a two-stage deal to pick the winner.

Step one is each of the four (Lori, Tonya, Amy and Eric) interviewed by Julie and asked "how much - if you won - of the $500,000 would you give up to go back into the house?" Lori says $50,000 and the other three say "half!" Bu-bye Lori. She has them sign this official looking contract to this effect making us think it's a commitment. To break the three way tie and cull the herd of four down to two, she asks the three how many of the remaining days they would spend eating only PB&J? Tonya says 21 and Amy and Eric both say "All".

So this leaves only Eric and Amy. Then Julie rips up the contracts... phew. They both wait on the front steps of the house while the house-mats are asked to do the paddle thing (see "most memorable moment" above) to vote between them. Biggest surprise? Lisa, Eric’s main squeeze, votes to take Amy. This was shocking. She had this really hurting face on when she does it... but I have to say I was more than a little impressed by it. And, all told, Amy would have won without Lisa's vote. Somehow I'm thinking the pea brain of Eric’s will not immediately get the game significance of her choice. Only Chiara and Roddy vote for Eric. So it's Amy back in the house.

How the hell did these girls get from the intelligent place where Roddy was toast to getting rid of Josh. I'm losing faith ...

Amy, after being re-introduced to the house, joins the other house-mats in preparation for the head-boy competition. They gang is told to wear swimsuits... and she's there in a red bikini with high heals!! Now they need a pole in the house and she can get busy.

um... Marcellas was, as expected, all sniffely when Amy came back in the house.

Note: neither Chiara or Lisa gives Josh a "good bye" video moment... or, at least, what they did say, BB did not show.

Josh gets very deep for the eviction and, wearing his best guido black silk collared shirt, makes an impassioned speech about "don't judge me on how I acted in this house..." er.. .ok, lets judge you on how you act when we don't see you?

Roddy's friends, when they interview them show off Roddy pictures and BB puts up this amazing picture of Roddy looking so completely tanked... we're talking stag-party-of-the-rich-and-famous level of tanked.

Gerry, during the paddle votes, was sitting in the Idiot Room... waiting... waiting... and he was really really looking like "darth vader unmasked" as in "Return of the Jedi".

The HoH competition included Amy!!! The deal was for all of them to climb into this big bathtub and sit down. No sleeping (30 seconds with eyes closed and you're out!) and no standing up. So it looked like an endurance deal. Then Julie asks Chiara (outgoing HoH) to dump the contents of "mystery bucket number 1" into the tub with the house-mats. Two large buckets of Squids! It's house-mat/calamari soup time!

Now they end the show here, telling us to watch on FRIDAY night for the winner and point out that there will be no show on Saturday.

Further more, next weeks Wednesday show will be two hours long with a surprise appearance by Sheryl Crow in-the-house to perform for the house-mats.

See ya!

* the funniest episode of this show has to be the show when chicken george went completely off his nut and did the space man thing in the shower.

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