Mostly harmless (corto) wrote,
Mostly harmless

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Hey... I've been reading all my friends out and boy, you guys are sure up to a lot.
It's time to share a little: this is zebra when she was 5! Someday, I'll post a recent pic or put it on the new web page ... when I get back to working on it... (immediately following her finding out that I've posted a recent picture, I'll be picking myself up off the floor and hoping that I can make it to a doctor... LOL

Lets, see: cook this (if your a meat eater... chicken meat that is).

This is the idiots guide to a yummi meal. "corto chicken"

You will need:
- some veggies... some green and red pepper and an onion. (maybe a half of each)
- some chicken... like one big fat breast - no bones.
- some flour, some cornstarch, some veggi oil, soya, plum souce, chilli peper (you know, that shaker of little hot things you stole from that restaurant last year...)
- little butter wont hurt,
- salt, pepper.
- a package of those noodles that my kids call "itchy bum noodles". They're like 50 packages for $2 ... ok, not quite but they're cheep. Get the 'oriental' flavour - any flavour will do!
- sauce pan and fry pan.

Ok, half fill the sauce pan with water. Pour in the 'flavour packet' from the noddle package. Heat it up and add the noodles when it's hot.
Wash and chop those veggies up. (no finger bits... yuck!!!)
Butter in Fry pan on stove and heat that pan up!
Add veggies to fry pan and salt them ... a little more ... good. Now stir them up and sizzle 'em till they're looken cooked... I man look at the onions.. they either look raw or cooked. No mistake.
Pour 'em out of the pan into a bowl.
Cut up the chicken into little pieces the size of a 'caramel' (member those little candies... yum). Roll them in flour. So, you have a plate with these little white (white from flour) blobs all over it.
Put a table spoon of Corn Starch in your hand and rub it all over the chicken pieces.

Did you forget to turn off the pan after you poured the veggies out? Good, so it's nice and hot... super. Put some veggi oil in there (some = two / three tablespoons). Is it hot? Can't tell? Touch it.. NONONO just kidding... Spit in it... No, don't gobb in it - yuck, ok skip that... it's hot by now anyways. The element should be at like 6-7 (out of 10) NEVER on HI ok.
Put the chicken in there. Yup in the oil... got a splatte screen? dam usefull things they are.
Should be sizzlin. Stir 'em around...
Nail a little soya souce in there with em... more sizzle.
Pour some (remember "some" from a few lines ago) plum souce into the pan with the sizzling chicken. stir stir stir stir... time for pepper and chilli peppers... (how hot do you like stuff?)
The chicken should start looking cooked... browning a bit.
Pour the veggies into the pan with the chicken. stir stir...
Remember those noodles? pour like a quarter cup of juice (that would be about 3 "somes") - Get it, three-somes! (I just can't help getting sexual when I talk food) from the noodles into the fry pan with everything else.. stir stir. the cornstarch will ensure that the juice thickens and so long as the chicken is cooked (take a piece out and cut it in half ... looked cooked to you?) it's done.

Put a scoop of the noodles (strained!) on a plate and a big scoop of the chicken veggie stuff. This will be really delicious and look kinda cool too.

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